Somewhere from across the hills abutting the Chittoor Arts college grounds, the Lapwing\u2019s shrill call pierced the peace of our cricket match. “\u2019Did-yoo-doo-it! Did-yoo-doo-it!\u201d It questioned. I ambled to the bowling end. Scratched my calf with my toes and took my position as the umpire. L. Ramesh, self-proclaimed \u2018pace\u2019 bowler adjusted his spectacles and waited as Farooq took guard. He took his own time. He took a bail out and rammed it into the ground, to mark his leg stump. And then, took about half an hour to place the bail back on the stumps, thumped his hands on his sides, dusting them. He studied the field, multiple times. I was almost dozing off when Farooq\u2019s \u201cLEG STUMP EMPIRE!\u201d woke me up. I never quite understood why some people called an umpire an \u2018empire\u2019. I shook off the grogginess and nodded. <\/p>\n
He was taking a middle stump guard but I didn\u2019t want to grow old waiting for him to change his guard, again. So I said \u2018Perfect anna! leg stump, bang on!\u2019 And then, Farooq took his stance and started banging the bat, behind his feet. I was almost expecting water to gush out of the hole he had managed to dig. So Praveen, I mean, Farooq was finally ready to face the bowler, L. Ramesh. <\/p>\n
Farooq, claimed he had made it to the Ranji probables. Now, that is big. For someone from Chittoor, forget being a part of the Ranji probables, being part of the district team itself was a big deal. But this man, did it! He had played at the highest level: a level no cricketer in Chittoor could dream of. At least in 1989. Which meant that Farooq, was a fixture in the town team. My dream team.<\/p>\n
I had toiled for three years now. Carrying the mat and nailing it on the pitch before matches and practice sessions. Watering the pitch and getting the the 25000 ton roller to even it out a bit. Lugging around the \u2018kit\u2019. Yes, I had done it all. I did all of that because just talent alone didn\u2019t get you a place in the Town team. You needed the blessings: Raju\u2019s. Reddy\u2019s. And of course, that of the \u2018Ranji probables\u2019 man, Farooq.<\/p>\n
Only a couple of days back, Reddy, the Town team captain, had told me \u201cWe need a medium pacer. Back up bowler. I am thinking of you.\u201d I cried like Kapil pa ji that day. But if I pissed of Farooq, there was no way I could get into the Town team. Forget Town team, I would be banned from playing book-cricket with my own self. <\/p>\n
Paceman L. Ramesh screamed in and bowled a beautiful yorker that smacked Farooq on his toes. Ramesh didn\u2019t even appeal. He just ran to deep midwicket celebrating. The fielding team was obviously delighted and ran behind Ramesh. It was not often that a college team had the town team on the mat, as Shastri would have put it. <\/p>\n
Ramesh, the bowler did a victory lap and came back and suddenly remembered he hadn\u2019t appealed. \u201cHow-how-how-how\u2026\u201d He went. I was almost starting to dance to his song when he finally appealed \u201c\u2026HOWZAAT! Empire?\u201d
\nI stared hard at Farooq. Right after he was thumped on his toes, Farooq performed a foot-shuffle that would have done Michael Jackson proud. Farooq had hopped away from the stumps and proceeded forward and was now standing almost in the middle of the pitch. Tapping the pitch with his bat and checking the bat\u2019s inside edge. He was sending a message! <\/p>\n
Ramesh\u2019s appeal was getting over-board now. He was sounding like an evangelist that had just gifted sight to a blind man. The fielding team, sounded like a thousand congregations. And then Farooq looked at his watch, looked at me and said \u201cCan we play the match please? I am wasting my time here.\u201d Now, I wanted to play for the town team, very badly, yes! But I thought to myself, \u2018I would be playing with this condescending prick!\u2019 I wasn\u2019t being all self-righteous and all, but I had had enough of these guys taking me for granted.
\nThat bird, the Lapwing, flew over us , screaming \u2018Did-yoo-doo-it! Did-yoo-doo-it\u2019 <\/p>\n
\u2018I just did.\u2019 I thought and slowly lifted my middle finger and shouted \u2018You are out!\u2019 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Somewhere from across the hills abutting the Chittoor Arts college grounds, the Lapwing\u2019s shrill call pierced the peace of our cricket match. “\u2019Did-yoo-doo-it! Did-yoo-doo-it!\u201d It questioned. I ambled to the bowling end. Scratched my calf with my toes and took my position as the umpire. L. Ramesh, self-proclaimed \u2018pace\u2019 bowler adjusted his spectacles and waited […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[93,66,72,57],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1393","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-childhood","category-chittoor","category-cricket","category-stories"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":false,"thumbnail":false,"medium":false,"medium_large":false,"large":false,"1536x1536":false,"2048x2048":false,"jetpack-portfolio-admin-thumb":false},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Suman Kumar","author_link":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/author\/suman-kumar\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Somewhere from across the hills abutting the Chittoor Arts college grounds, the Lapwing\u2019s shrill call pierced the peace of our cricket match. “\u2019Did-yoo-doo-it! Did-yoo-doo-it!\u201d It questioned. I ambled to the bowling end. Scratched my calf with my toes and took my position as the umpire. L. Ramesh, self-proclaimed \u2018pace\u2019 bowler adjusted his spectacles and waited…","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s2Gbk8-it","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1964,"url":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/2017\/03\/kl-and-the-circus\/","url_meta":{"origin":1393,"position":0},"title":"KL and the Circus Called Life","author":"Suman Kumar","date":"March 14, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"In the summer of 1985 Arun KL confided in me. He was in love with a girl who was in my class. I was in seventh grade and he, in the\u00a0eighth. He seemed quite disturbed by his lack of courage in approaching the girl and letting her know what he\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "chittoor"","block_context":{"text":"chittoor","link":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/category\/chittoor\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/IMG-20170302-WA0002.jpg","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/IMG-20170302-WA0002.jpg 1x, https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/IMG-20170302-WA0002.jpg 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":592,"url":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/2004\/11\/diwali-uli-and-other-stories\/","url_meta":{"origin":1393,"position":1},"title":"Diwali: Uli and other stories","author":"Suman Kumar","date":"November 10, 2004","format":false,"excerpt":"Have a cracker of a Diwali people! When I was a kid, I used to get up early morning, bathe, wear new clothes, and burst crackers. 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We did find some wildlife\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "chittoor"","block_context":{"text":"chittoor","link":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/category\/chittoor\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":848,"url":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/2005\/12\/stories-from-chittoor\/","url_meta":{"origin":1393,"position":3},"title":"Stories from Chittoor","author":"Suman Kumar","date":"December 22, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Cops slapping boys and girls in a park in Meerut might sound amazing to most of you. But given my experiences, it does seem normal to me. It is probably much worse in smaller towns. I grew up in a small town called Chittoor. And here are the stories related\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "stories"","block_context":{"text":"stories","link":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/category\/stories\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1113,"url":"https:\/\/sumankumar.com\/blog\/2010\/03\/the-end-of-the-revolution\/","url_meta":{"origin":1393,"position":4},"title":"The End of the Revolution","author":"Suman Kumar","date":"March 9, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"A look at the news should tell you how the so called Maoists have embarked on a highway to self-destruction. No, I don't know enough about their philosophy or why they took up arms struggle. Not because I don't care. Because it doesn't make sense. 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